Picture this: You’re in a meeting with a pretty big group. Your boss’s boss is at the front of the room speaking about something related to your job. You’re listening, taking notes, trying to catch the little pieces of information you need that pertain to you. In the middle of a note you hear the boss’s boss say something and your brain does a little hiccup. “Did they just say that wrong?” you think. You look around to see if anyone else is going to ask, to bring it up, to point it out and fix the mistake, but no one does. Now you’re worried everyone is going to walk away thinking one thing when another thing is true.
What should you do?
It can feel really scary to correct someone in public. It might seem like we’re calling that person out and they might get defensive. And really all you want to do is make sure everyone has the right information. Here are some of the thoughts I’ve had in this situation: If this person is a leader, surely they have the right information, right? Have I missed something in my own understanding of that idea? I don’t feel qualified to speak up. Surely someone else will point it out, right? Someone who has more authority or power.
What’s wild is that there’s a good chance at least half the people in that room are thinking these same thoughts. So, you’re never alone in being this person. But it feels like it because you’re only in your head and it can be scary to correct someone. We have a lot of cultural training around only speaking up when you’re sure about something, and confidence can mask a whole host of issues.
You are absolutely allowed and able to point out flaws in information or logic or missteps in communication. But here are a couple of tips to make it go down smoother.
1. Ask a question– “I thought I heard you say that we had 20% growth in that area, but my recollection is that it was closer to 10%. Can you tell me where you got that information so I can check my figures?“
If it’s something that feels less straightforward than a number, like an interpretation of results or a goal, you can still use a question, “My interpretation of that was different. I thought we were trying to achieve X thing. Do you mind walking through how you got to that conclusion so I can understand the logic?” It shows that you want to learn, but also give the person a chance to correct themselves if they have faulty logic along the way.
2. Bring your litigation papers– My high school best friend went on to be a lawyer, but when we were in school together if we had some point to prove to a teacher or someone else, we would always joke to bring our litigation papers aka our receipts. If you have something handy to reference, you can pull that up and use the documentation to back up your perspective. “You said that people are more likely to interact with our products at home, but our latest survey showed they prefer to use them at work.”
If it’s about your company culture or new ways you’re trying to communicate, make sure you have something like a Code of Conduct or another artifact to reference. This gives you a lot of legitimacy and can help everyone in learning something.
Bottom line: Leaders get things wrong. You don’t have to be sheepish or scared to speak up about it. If you’re anxious about the blow back for pointing out the issue, try phrasing it as a question to lead with curiosity. And if they ultimately get defensive, you can reply with something like “I just wanted to clarify this so no one leaves here with the wrong information.” Even if that person feels threatened, you’ve built up social and political cache with the group around you, which is more likey to insulate you from any retaliation.
